UN‑OFF‑END‑ABLE

Choosing peace before offense takes root.

This past year, the Lord began teaching me about offense. I had always thought of offense as something obvious, but the more I sat with it, the more I realized it often begins with one familiar word: hurt. After I wrote and shared a post called “There’s Always One,” I started noticing how often life gives us chances to practice overlooking offense.

At first, it was almost enjoyable to catch those moments and choose peace. Then came a situation recently that felt different. Someone crossed a boundary last week, and this time it was not so easy to simply “consider the source.” I knew there was a choice to make, especially because the situation kept coming back to my mind today.

As I mowed the yard and talked with the Lord about it, Holy Spirit gently reminded me of a time when I had created offense for someone else. It may not have been the same situation, but the conviction was clear. Before I could point too firmly at someone else, God reminded me to look at my own heart.

Proverbs 19:11 suddenly became a mirror. It reminded me that being UN‑OFF‑END‑ABLE is not about pretending nothing hurts; it is about refusing to let hurt lead.

This past week, my daughter made T-shirts for us to wear. I knew that was a big deal because people will be people, and wearing that word meant we were putting ourselves out there to be tested. The front of the shirt says UNOFFENDABLE, and the back breaks it down in a way I needed to remember:

That was my UN moment. UN is not weakness; it is a conscious decision. I choose not to agree with the offense or let another person’s behavior rule my spirit.

Then came the OFF moment. I had to switch off the reaction—not my love, compassion, or responsibility, but my need to rehearse and respond from hurt.

Then came the END moment. Offense loves to be repeated, explained, defended, and shared, but I had to let the cycle stop with me.

Finally came the reminder I needed most: I am ABLE.

God has not called us to peace without equipping us for it. In Him, I am able to pause, able to forgive, able to stop the cycle, and able to find peace without becoming easily wounded.

Every day will bring opportunities to be offended, but every offense is also an opportunity to practice spiritual strength. We can carry it, repeat it, and let it grow, or we can surrender it to the Lord and let it end.

This teaches us how we become UN‑OFF‑END‑ABLE: not because people stop hurting us, but because we stop giving offense permission to live in us.

~The Bible says in Proverbs 19:11: “The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; And it is his glory to pass over a transgression.”

~Prayer: Lord, help me become UN‑OFF‑END‑ABLE. Teach me to pause before I react, forgive before bitterness grows, and choose peace when my feelings want to fight. Guard my heart with Your peace and guide me with Your love. Amen.

~Challenge: For the next 7 days, when offense tries to pull you in, pause and say, “I will not carry this.” Choose peace on purpose, and let the cycle end with you.

I look forward to hearing from anyone that purposely takes the challenge!

Carole House Van Kleef